Things X 5 Special – PS4 Concepts

by Francois Joron

One of the big concerns over Sony’s unveiling of the PlayStation 4 last week was that the actual console was not shown. Some were accusing the Japanese company of not having any designs ready. Nothing could be further from the truth. After a night out with a couple of drunk Sony engineers, it was revealed to me that they actually have so many concepts in mind that they don’t know which one to chose and I’m happy to share of them with you.

1

The Streamer

The “Streamer”

As you know by now, the PS4 won’t be backward compatible with your previous PS3 titles. But, fear not, you will be able to stream those titles from the Internet without having to store them on your console. To achieve this magnificent idea all you need is 2 proprietary 3″ giga-ultra-turbo-ethernet cables (sold separately), 2 compatible giga-ultra-turbo routers, and a monthly bandwidth plan with a cost equivalent to rent for a chic apartment in New York.

2

The Toaster

The “Toaster”

Not happy with their grill design, Sony’s engineers now fully embrace the culinary concept and deliver a console that is actually a toaster oven. Perfect for multiplayer matches, as you can prepare healthy food while shooting your friends in the face.

3

The Mind-Bender

The “Mind-Bender”

Where do the discs go? Where’s the power button? Is there even one? The “Mind-Bender” connects to the player’s psyche with its ominous and spheric design. You better have a perfectly flat living room.

4

The Panicker

The “Panic Compressor”

The player’s security is at the forefront of this design concept. You fear the Playstation Network has been hacked again? Simply press the big red button and your username, personal and credit card information as well as all of your data will disappear as if you never existed. Maybe you never did.

5

The David Cager

The “David Cager”

Your controller connects directly to David Cage’s mind (his actual location is a secret) and let’s you access truly complex, realistic and emotional games.

 

 

So, which design do you think will find its way to the retailers?

Don’t forget, you can drop me hints on my Twitter account. Also, you are welcome to send me a friend request on my Wii U, my Nintendo Network ID is Jorf-Jorf. Have a great week!

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